So I've been home for two weeks from College of Eastern Utah and it sucks. It's not that I don't love my parents but they both work full time and Brian is in freaking Kentucky so I am home alone. a lot. I love the dorms because there are people EVERYWHERE. I hate it because it's like I could hang out with people if I really put myself out there but I also have this fear that when I move back to Price I'll just miss everyone at home again and then I'll be unhappy there. I feel so odd because it's like once you go somewhere new, everyone thinks it's like you're on vacation and you're exactly the same when you back. And sometimes I wish I was the same as before. I wish I could just be that Grace sometimes but she doesn't exist. I also feel like all I have done for the last year and a half is complain. I hate Price, I hate Murray, I hate summer, I hate winter. Bleh I am American well above poverty level getting an education and yet I whine about my little white girl problems? I used to a very positive person so this odd for me still. I am cynical and cold about things and I miss not being that way. Maybe I never made room to be a pessimist so now it's taking over me. Where is the medium in all of this? Also, I am debating between where I am going to college next fall. It's either Utah State or Southern Utah University. But some days it's the University of Utah. And none of this matters if I can't pass Math 1050. There I go complaining again. Please someone stop me. This really has no point to be written other than the fact I want to read it in a year and laugh at myself. There's my life this evening. I'm going to listen to some T-Swift.
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